My Sex Drive vs. the Mirena Coil
So after much procrastinating over whether I should write this post and share a deeply personal as well as anguishing feature of my life with you all, I have decided to. For selfish reasons as well as altruistic; I hope to get some of this weight off of my chest as well as hoping someone experiencing the same problem feels that they are not alone.
So here goes . . .
Historically I have never been blessed with an easy menstrual cycle; far from it. It nearly cost me my job in 2016 due to poor timing and a misunderstanding. Despite having most of the symptoms associated with Endometriosis, the GP’s at my doctors surgery refused to think it was that even though I’d been in excruciating pain to the point where I couldn’t go to work. They just kept saying “It’s just heavy periods and we’ll supply you with Codeine and Naproxen” after they sent me for an ultrasound to look for polycystic ovaries which came back inconclusive.
After a while I gave up, feeling that I wasn’t going to get anywhere seeing as all the GP’s wanted to do was to put me on some form of hormone contraception or give me pain meds. I get that for some people this sorts everything out without any hiccups. If you are one of those people, know this; I am insanely jealous of you. Aside from the horrific amounts of pain and blood, my sex life was pretty sweet; we’d be intimate probably 3-4 times a week which isn’t half bad.
Eventually fed up and aggrieved that he had to keep seeing me in agony every month and knowing that I’d likely to have to keep having days off as going to work was pretty much a write off at these times, my partner persuaded me to give it another go with the GP’s. So I did.
Even though I had seen this Doctor before, for some reason, she seemed to take me seriously this time. So seriously that she referred me to the hospital to see a consultant gynaecologist, which I managed to get an appointment with several weeks later. To be honest I felt that the consultant was bored and really couldn’t be arsed. So she referred me back to my GP to have a Mirena Coil or IUS fitted as she was “confident” that this would sort out my problems.
Now I was reluctant to have this as I had previously taken Progestogen based pills before and I had been on them for a time period of 5 years, which by the end of that I was in a depressive state, I hated the way I looked as they gave me bad acne on my neck and I couldn’t shift any weight, not to mention it literally killed my sex drive to the point where my partner and I would not have sex for months in any shape or form. So when I was informed that the Mirena contained Progestogen I wasn’t thrilled. However she said that this device only has a tiny amount of the hormone in it (4 x less) and that I should be fine.
Well we’d see in time I guess. So I went back to my GP, told what she said and then got referred to another surgery as there was no one currently qualified to fit a Mirena at my surgery! So about another 4 weeks went by before I ended up having the damn thing fitted. When I did have it inserted . . . OH MY FUCKING GOD!!! The pain was unreal, I started to cramp pretty much instantly and I nearly fainted as my blood pressure plummeted. Afterward I think I bled for about 6-8 weeks non-stop which was a right royal pain in the arse! Suddenly the bleeding stopped and everything was fine. For the next 6 months or so everything was fine. I didn’t feel like I was dying every cycle and my bleeding was very much reduced. Okay my partner and I weren’t having quite as much sex as we were but then I was very busy at work as my job is fairly hectic and exhausting in the summer months.
Autumn came around and the work load dropped off and I had noticed that my bleeding had started to increase and the pain each month was starting to come back. Also despite not being knackered at the end of every working day, I just didn’t feel in the mood to get intimate with my partner. Now we’ve been together for 13 years this year and we are very much in love. So it’s not the usual decline in hot lust before you think that, I wish it was. I went back to my GP who fobbed me off with “keep an eye on it” meaning my pain and bleeding, she glossed over the noted decline in my sex drive. I think it was in January where I really questioned whether the Mirena was doing much, as I woke up at 4.20am crying and whimpering as it felt like my uterus was being ripped downwards through my cervix which was very reminiscent of what I had used to experience. Since then it hasn’t been as terrible as that morning but still my cycle appears to be trying its dandiest to come back with a vengeance.
What is probably the worst thing is when I do have sporadic moments of being horny, my man is usually working his shifts and I end up using the various sex toys that I get provided in order to thoroughly test them. This means that he gets pushed away time and time again as I’m really not in the mood which then makes me feel like an awful person as I’m putting all the effort into product reviews but reluctantly neglecting intimate time with my best friend.
I’m now at the point where I’m trying Evening Primrose Oil combined with Horny Goat Weed supplements to try to resurrect my seemingly dying sex drive as I don’t want to go back to so much pain every month where all I want to do is cry and curl up in bed between throwing up between waves of agony throughout my abdomen, back and legs and I know that my man doesn’t want to see me in that state again either. However I love having sex with him and would like to feel up for it more than once in a sodding blue moon.
So this brings us up to speed to the current day, where I’m pouring my heart out to you all, hoping that this post brings me some self-acceptance but also reaches someone who feels equally crap about their situation. In my mind, despite having 4 times less Progestogen than the Desogestrel pills I used to be on all those years ago, I still think that I appear to be super sensitive to this synthetic hormone and that it has killed my sex drive, furthermore, some days I can sometimes feel myself sliding back into a depressive and anxious state.
If you have had a similar experience to me and made a decision on what to do or if you know of something that may help me have the best of both worlds, I’d really like to hear from you as I haven’t a clue and feel that my so called health professionals don’t have much of one either. Also if you are in the same predicament, please know that you are not alone and I’d love to hear from you too!
I was able to download this e-book free of charge thanks to a link that its author sent me in exchange for an honest and impartial review which by no means changes my thoughts on the book.
When the author of The Art of Female Masturbation, Carla Bern dropped me a message to enquire if I would be interested in reviewing her first e-book, I felt quite honoured as I usually just review sex toys as my loyal readers are very familiar with. I replied to Carla to say that I would love the chance to review her writing and I felt that this would be a fantastic opportunity to delve into a different kind of product review. At the end of the day the book is about getting yourself off so it's not a huge departure from my usual reviewing habits.
Now considering I haven't written a book review since my school years; hopefully I can do this book justice and not ramble on too much . . .
So it's nearly that time of the year when the whole world seems to relish in the celebration of love. But if you want to make this year's Valentine's Day one that your partner will never forget, why not consider using some or all of these tips?
Secretly Book a Hotel Room
Yeah okay, it's a bit cliché but it works! Although it's not a surprise, we're doing this exact thing this year. If you can afford it, book a nicely presented room at a hotel. It doesn't have to be miles away from home, just far enough away from all the crap at home. This way you can concentrate on each other and it'll give you both a chance to connect on a more intimate level once you're away from all of the usual day to day distractions.
Oh and if you can, see if you can buy some new lingerie for yourself or your partner and save this for your weekend away. Just don't be surprised if it doesn't stay on for very long! You can also up the ante by buying some new sex toys for you both to enjoy when your tucked up in bed on Valentine's weekend. However this doesn't need to be restricted to this particular weekend, if for whatever reason you can't do anything on the 14th February, you can always do this and have your very own personal Valentine's dirty weekend away!
I've decided to tell you a little bit more about myself and how my other half and I came to introduce BDSM into our lives.
Towards the end of 2013, my other half and I sat down and debated how we could improve our sex life as due to a combination of things outside of our control, it was pretty much in the toilet and we were both feeling pretty fed up with each other.
I can't quite remember how we got onto the topic of BDSM but we discussed it a bit more and decided to give it a try, nothing heavy to begin with, just a bit of light bondage and some playful spanking (as we used to go horse-riding, riding crops were already on hand).
For my first post for the hints and tips page, I thought that I should probably start with the basics.
Funnily enough I had a conversation with a friend at work this week and he had no idea that there were so many different kinds of lube there were. So for all the people out there who are unaware of the different varieties of lube; this one's for you.
Or if you just want to help me keep my blog going without going shopping, please consider clicking on the button below and donating whatever you can afford!
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